My question is: Does this negative body image struggle ever end? Can women really heal their body image pains? Is there any women who actually love their bodies??!? I feel as if I have been battling this issue for so long now that it is making me wonder if I will ever heal!! And as you age, it seems there are more things the ego can pick apart and attack you with…
Thank you dearly!
In a Word: Yes!
Hey Lisa –
Wow you believe in leading with the big questions don’t you? 😀
I love your question though, because it’s something I’ve thought about often but funnily enough I’ve never written about it before! So thank you for asking it 🙂
The quick, maybe glib, answer is “Yes”, the body image struggle can absolutely end. Women can really heal their body image pains. There are many women who do actually love their bodies.
Is it easy? It can be relatively easy.
Is it quick? No.
But nor will it take as long as you might think. And it doesn’t mean that you have to wait for the world to change either though if you find yourself on the path of loving your body, you’ll be helping to change the world J
What does have to change is the way you care for yourself, mentally, physically and emotionally.
The good news is that’s totally and completely within your control. J You will have to focus on the choices you’re making about what you’re allowing in to your mind. Would I be right in betting that you’re already a bit of a master at choosing what you allow into your body most of the time?
The Mind Toxin That Is Negative Body Image
Negative Body Image is a mind toxin, I believe. It gets into your awareness and your belief system when you’re young and have no filters to know that the ideas feeding it are just a small part of reality, not all of reality. And there’s a lot of money – billions and billions and BILLIONS of dollars feeding the messages that feed your negative body image.
99% of those messages are tailored to part you from your money. That’s not what they SAY of course – they appeal to women’s desire to feel feminine, beautiful, desirable, to fit in.
They push every ‘fear’ button we have to make sure that we keep comparing ourselves to the images in the magazines and to one another so we keep feeling like we’re somehow less than every other woman.
When we believe that, we will keep throwing our money at the new mascara, hair colour, lotion, pill, program, potion that might finally be the magic ingredient to make us ‘perfect’ – you know that story right?
And you know that most of the stuff they’re pushing doesn’t even come close to delivering on the promise of the messages pushing the products. Yes I’m cynical. 🙂
Women’s magazines are pretty much entirely funded by the companies who push this stuff. The articles they write must support the messages their advertisers are pushing. They support the notion that women must be thin, sexually appealing and ageless or they are somehow ‘less’.
That’s the messaging about women that’s out in the world, that’s what we absorb from the other women in our lives.
Until you get conscious about the messages. Until you decide if it works for you. Until you decide if that’s who YOU want to be and if that’s who you really are. Until you do get conscious and make that choice, loving your body will keep being a struggle.
Most of the information about women in the world is not about who we are, what we achieve, what we contribute – it’s about how much we weigh, what size our bodies are, how well-preserved we are. Even powerful and highly accomplished women have to put up with commentary about how they look. Men never have to deal with that kind of language or judgement about their very selves.
I’m ranting I know – and you know that transforming your negative body image is a very complex issue. I do promise though (if you’re of a mind to accept anyone’s promises right now :)) that yes it is possible to love your body. I now know dozens of women who do. They might still have those moments of doubt or regret that their [stomach] isn’t [flatter], but they no longer define themselves by it.
They focus instead on how they feel about their lives, what makes their hearts beat faster with joy or love, what challenges they can face down and what they can add to the world.
To me, it seems that’s what we’re here for – not to feather the nest of some dork at a chemical company who’s telling us we’re not pretty enough. Bugger that.
I’m not sure I’ve given you the answer you wanted Lisa, but I’ve given you the answer I could. I hope it helps 🙂
The Body Bliss 101 course goes into all of this stuff in much more details, and uses EFT Tapping to help you defuse it as well.
Also feel free to ask more questions!
Warmest wishes to you lovely lady 🙂